If you’re thinking of making a gingerbread house this Christmas, first of all: welcome. Second of all: please learn from my mistakes…
I’ve built enough gingerbread structures to confidently say this is not a craft, it’s an endurance sport. So before you confidently stroll into a shop and grab the biggest village scene you can find, let me stop you right there.
1. Don’t Buy a Gingerbread Village Unless You Truly Love Suffering
Those village kits look magical on the box. Snowy streets! Tiny ornate houses! Festive joy!
What they actually are is a collection of random cookie pieces that do not want to be connected. If you love puzzles, chaos, and mild rage, go for it. Otherwise, stick to the simplest small houses - or one big house.
2. Skip the Fancy Gingerbread Cutters
Those gingerbread cookie cutter sets? Don’t bother. You can achieve the same result with a cardboard templates, or be like me and buy the cutters, put them in a cupboard, and never see the grace of day again.
3. Buy a Spare Kit. Trust Me.
If you’re buying a gingerbread kit, do not order it online. If you’re buying it in a shop, cradle that box like a newborn all the way home - or just buy a spare. There will be broken pieces. There may be tears (possibly yours). If you don’t buy a spare, congratulations, you’ve chosen chaos.
And while you’re there, grab extra jelly tots and smarties. The kit will suggest there are “plenty”. The kit is lying.
4. Icing Sugar Is Not Glue. I Repeat: Not Glue.
Learn from m and buy proper cake glue (from Tiger Tiger or similar). Icing sugar icing just does not cut it. It slides, it collapses, and it betrays you at the worst possible moment.
5. Decorate Before Assembly
If you can convince your child to apply the icing before the house is assembled, you’ve won. Decorating flat gingerbread pieces is infinitely easier than trying to ice a standing house that’s threatening to collapse under its own ambition. Fail to persuade them? Then sit back and admire the “artistic licence” chaos they’ve created - icing on the floor counts as festive, right?
6. Build the Base First. Then Walk Away.
Do not rush. Build the base of the house and let it fully set before you even think about the roof. Gravity is not on your side here.
7. My Photos vs Reality
If you’ve seen pictures of my gingerbread houses and thought, wow, she’s winning, please know my personal photos were taken during lockdown when we had nothing else going on in our lives. This was survival crafting. There was definitely mess - it’s just not in shot!
8. Let the Mess Be the Memory
Keep your sanity and only take photos at these points…
One at the start, when everyone’s hopeful and the table is still (mostly) clean.
Another halfway through, when the laughter’s louder and the icing has taken on a life of its own.
The unfiltered mess. One that I’m missing… It will be a memory that you look back on with fondness - promise!!
And one at the end, when the house is finished, and just before they demolish it!!
9. A Final Truth About Gingerbread Houses
We carefully glue them to cake boards.
We pack them like priceless treasures.
We transport them with hope.
And then… no one really eats them. There’s too much other food at Christmas. And honestly? That’s fine. It means I don’t feel quite so bad about the sheer busload of sweets involved.
